Part 38: Update -XXXII- Gotta catch 'em all
Things went to hell last time. There's no other way to say it. We found out that Lann and Reynn fucked everything eight ways to Sunday by being incredibly bratty little bastards that thought they were the hottest shit around and could do no wrong.Then Brandelis nuked their parents along with Hauyn and Lann sacrificed himself to kill Brandelis even though that solved absolutely nothing because the Cogna are still out there wrecking the world.
We then watched the credits roll as Reynn wandered around Nine Wood Hills while being completely dead inside.
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But after being sent back to the title screen and trying to start the game again, we got greeted with this box. Part of me just wants to leave it here, but I kind of like several of the Final Fantasy characters, so we should probably do something to help them not be overrun by endless Cogna.
So, here we go. Let's see what this "No" stuff is all about.
Update 32 Highlights - World of Final Fantasy
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[???]: It was your doing. Yours. And now you would refuse to accept the consequences?
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[???]: Then I will ask you again. Will you, or will you not accept the consequences?
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[???]: Very well.
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Take it easy Anamika. There'll be time to hit the bong once this whole time weaving thing is finished. We can't have you screwing around with the timeline while stoned out of your mind. That's how most of the extended universes got made.
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Welcome to the Postscript. That's right, we're not done with this game yet. Here's where the end game clean up starts.
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Forget whoever that is, where are Shelke and Quistis? They were here a minute ago.
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[???]: I shall yield to you all nine of my precious lives... and give you a chance to continue your tale differently... and weave the threads of time anew.
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Stop talking crazy Reynn. There's no such thing as a "Tama".
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Reynn has clearly gone insane. I vote we leave her back in Nine Wood.
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Calling what Enna Kros told us a "plan" is a bit of a stretch. It was a suggestion at best.
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I'm personally okay with all of that.
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Alright, that's enough screwing with Reynn. I'm the LP writer, I'm immune to time flow fuckery. Reynn couldn't accept what happened and was clearly distraught, so Tama offered her a way of making things right. Unfortunately, in order to pull off a time reversal of that length, Tama had to sacrifice all of her lives instead of just one. Like Anamika explained to us at the start, there's a price to pay for all of that stuff, and Tama decided to pay it in order to help Reynn.
Somehow Serafie still knows about Tama, or at least Tama's true form (Tamamohime), so maybe the Tama we knew is Tamamohime's child or something. Either way, Tama has been sacrificed to the flow of time, which means Serafie had to be spliced in to fill Tama's role in order to prevent some insane paradox from happening.
Now that Reynn knows exactly how things will go wrong, she finally decides to do something for the first time in this game and convinces Lann that they need to do a little investigating and planning instead of just complaining before blindly marching towards their goal anyway.
Update 32 Highlights - Strategy Conference
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Lann, stop talking. You don't have any legitimate idea what it is you're saying. Stop pretending.
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Ignoring how it is that Reynn suddenly knows all of this stuff (Rorrick is mentioned in his Who's Who as not revealing his work to Lann or Reynn), this is how a Mirage Keeper's powers actually work. Their mother had the power to bend or "break" the laws of the world while their father had the ability to create something from nothing, in a sense. So Rorrick created those Knives that Lusse (as well as Reynn) use which have the power to subdue a Mirage, as well as the Prismariums which can contain them. Lusse used these tools to control the Mirages by creating worlds in the Prismariums to house them.
So when the two of them got married, they basically became all-powerful rulers of Grymoire, on the level of god (more-so for Lusse as she was already extremely powerful).
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And this is where that little holy matrimony invariably went wrong. Rorrick and Lusse were powerful, but they needed to work together and agree. Lann and Reynn just inherited both powers to different degrees (Lann has more Architect power while Reynn leans towards Breaker) and could do whatever the hell they wanted.
Unfortunately, Lusse coddled the two of them too much ("You have super special powers that will bring happiness to everyone! You're both precious and mommy's favouritist.") Because Rorrick kept his work secret, the twins basically saw their mom as wearing the pants in the family and their dad as some mooch that married into greatness, so whenever he halfheartedly tried to reign them in and stop them from being arrogant little shits, they brushed him off because they didn't respect him. After all, mom thought they were special and perfect little angels.
Rorrick and Lusse were sort of shitty parents, is what I'm saying. Rorrick never had the
"No-fail" policies and participation trophies are bullshit.
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Further evidence of shitty parenting: Lann and Reynn were siphoning power away from their mom and she did nothing to put a stop to that. Rorrick goes "Hey, stop stealing power from mom", and the twins respond with "Whatever, dad! Mom loves seeing us steal her power!" Then Lusse just looks over and goes "No, it's fine! They're happy! It's totally okay that my godly powers are being taken over by two children that have no idea how to properly handle them. Have I mentioned how proud of them I am and how special they are?"
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Hauyn is a summoner, which is how Lann initially managed to summon Brandelis despite no summoners being present (like Yuna/Eiko/Rydia). He stuck her in a prismarium, which allowed him to use her powers, similar to a Mirage.
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This entire family is just an endless source of failure. On top of all of the above, Lann and Reynn also managed to provide the Exnine Knights with a living battery in the form of an imprisoned Hauyn.
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You're hoping for an awful lot with that plan.
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I'm betting it won't, personally. Lann and Reynn don't have a good track record.
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Now that that little make up session is finished, we can start cracking on...
What the fuck are we doing again?
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I guess we're going to talk to Serafie. Although she's with us right now, so I'm not sure why we need to go back to Nine Wood to use the Rumor Radar.
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It didn't "seem" like they recognized you. They directly stated that they knew you.
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Yes, Reynn. That's what pleiad would suggest. If it was just the three of them then they'd be a trio.
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Okay, that gives us a general goal for the moment. I guess Serafie will know where to find those other four.
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Play along with what, exactly? From the sounds of it, you already filled Lann in on what happened. If it were possible to cause a paradox you would have already done it.
Whatever. So Serafie will be filling Tama's role entirely from this point. Basically everything is exactly the same gameplay-wise, except we won't be hearing "the" peppered throughout conversations. Instead we've got pixie Daria following us around.
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Serafie also tells us that Anamika was wandering around looking for us earlier. She isn't actually, this is just a clue to go to her to continue story progress.
By the way, that mushroom on Serafie's head is a Glowshroom. It temporarily makes Mirages easier to imprism. Need to think about how I want to make use of this.
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Before that, we need to check on the Rumor Radar. There's a bunch of something going on throughout the world.
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After that, we go check with Anamika. She says nothing about looking for us. She just has a story progress icon over her head.
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She has four quests for us that need to be completed. Namely, we have to go hunt down those four Mirages that we may have accidentally set free while collecting keys.
I guess we'll just start knocking these off. Be aware that that we're going to be fighting Diablos, Odin, Leviathan, and Bahamut. These fights are a step above the typical battles (well, Leviathan and Bahamut are anyway. More on that in a bit).
Update 32 Highlights - I remember when you used to be able to kill an entire zone
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Everyone ready for another round of "Toriyama's hard-on for Lightning"? He wasn't even involved in this game and his presence is still felt purely through references.
[???]: Traveler. Test your strength?
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[Odin]: They call me a butcher? Rubbish. I merely challenge fools who would be challenged, and they die.
Odin is voiced by Bob Joles in English and Kiyoshi Kobayashi in Japanese.
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[Odin]: He who lives by the sword must be quick to draw it. Truly, they met with no foul play.
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Normally I would side with Odin on this, but my respect for FF Odin has greatly diminished over the years. He's become kind of a loser. Whether it's getting beaten in a sword fight by Seifer in FFVIII or being turned into Lightning's Pokemon in an attempt to make her seem badass, he's something of a joke at this point. That will hold true for this battle with him as well.
[Odin]: Hmm... It is a troubling thought. To be gone less than a century, and return to find swordsmanship so diminished. Troubling indeed...
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[Odin]: Ahh... Your spirit is impressive. Let us begin!
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[Odin]: I remember you. To fight again after so long would be a thrill... But, you catch me as my blood quickens for another-- my first worthy foe in ages. This trickery-- this space in which you have confined me-- I'll not be detained.
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*Odin manages to somehow carve his way out of the shadow realm. I guess that's a thing Zantetsuken can do*
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[Odin]: Ohhh... Missed by a hair. Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Good. You're the strongest warrior I've crossed swords with in years. And yet, 'twould be poor form to pursue this now. Find a new blade, and we shall continue this test of our might.
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*Lightning decides to go looking for advice*
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Odin Round 2. This quest jumps around a bit with little warning.
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[Odin]: You would try me with the same sword that failed you before?
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[Odin]: Hm? That girl. She looks like Ramuh's...
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[Ramewl]: Grandkid!
[Odin]: Hmph. I see you've been sniffing about. Is-is this the best you can muster?
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[Odin]: Urgh...
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[Odin]: Hmph. Silence! Make your peace, before I cleave you in twain.
Update 32 Highlights - Odin "fight"
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[Odin]: What? I-I cower before no one!
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Odin is pathetic. Out of the four we have to fight, this will be the biggest bore (at least for me). That's saying something considering what's on the horizon with Diablos.
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A basic Thunder spell can deal out 5,400 due to Odin's devastating weakness to it. Thundara will deal 7,500, a tenth of his HP per hit. If you somehow don't have a Thundara Mirajewel at this point, then you can just pop over to Chocolatte's and buy a Thunder/Thundara/Thundaga seed. She starts carrying the -aga seeds near the beginning of the Postscript.
Odin's basic physical attack hits one for about 1,100 damage. He has an attack called Slash which can hit for about 1,500-1,700. He also has Double Cut, which can hit two or three times for about 600 each. All of these are single target, though. He's also not especially fast, which means you can easily fall back on the typical 2 against 1 strategy.
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Gungnir is his special attack, capable of hitting both stacks for about 2,500 each. Odin is defeated the very next turn. He didn't even try and use Zantetsuken (this has a chance to instant kill. The chance increases as AP/HP gets lower). I'm not even sure if he can use it here to be perfectly honest, since he just stood around not doing it while nearly dead.
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Yeah, Lightning's skill sure did surpass yours, Odin. Lann, Reynn, and Ramewl all helped gang up on you and you didn't even use your signature move. So much skill on display here.
What happened to you, man? You used to be cool.
[Odin]: I'm pleased to have met so fierce a warrior. Ours was a duel to remember.
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[Ramewl]: Ramewl!
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The end of this quest will just give us Odin, without having to resort to trying to capture him. We'll also get a memento so that we can turn one of our other Mirages into an Odin if we want.
Odin is a recurring summon/boss in the series that appears in almost every game (X being a notable exception, although Yojimbo has a similar function). He's based on the Odin from Norse Mythology, although the horse he rides (based on Sleipnir from mythology) appears as a regular horse in some games or a horse with six legs in others (myth Sleipnir has eight). WoFF's Odin is notable for having one eye, something that mythological Odin is known for but isn't usually depicted in other FF appearances. His Gungnir attack is based on Norse Odin's spear of the same name.
Zantetsuken is his signature attack and it has a chance to instant kill all enemies (although this doesn't work on bosses or certain special enemies). I don't think I've ever heard it being interpreted as "sword that sunders iron" before. It's known as "Iron-cutting sword", which I guess is pretty much the same thing.
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This is purely personal opinion: I'm not a big fan of how Odin has been treated as time has gone on. On top of his attack being terribly mistranslated in VII (Gunge Lance. Essentially "Sticky/Slimy Lance"), he also gets swatted like a fly by that goober, Seifer, in VIII (pictured above). And of course now he's largely become associated with Lightning in FFXIII where he's her Pokemon/horse and his Zantetsuken is used by her.
And then there's this fight, which is just... sad. The only basis I know of for the insane -200 Thunder weakness and his
Update 32 Highlights - Just when you think it's safe to sail again, she rises up and then
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Let's just move on. At least, that's what I want to say, but we're about to see another big slap in face to Odin coming up. In a sense, anyway.
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[Moogle]: Oh! She's been sighted on the Low Seas, kupo!
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[Moogle]: The great sea-demon, Leviathan, kupo!
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Didn't you say that your ship couldn't travel there?
[Moogle]: Count me in too, kupo!
*The screen goes black and we hear the vague sounds of an ill-advised jump off a continent*
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[Moogle]: In the waters of Babil, not far from the Rainbow Shore, kupo!
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*Adamantoise rises from the water*
[Adamantoise]: What's all this noise? Who might you be?
*A brief vengeance explanation later*
[Adamantoise]: Hoh... So, she killed your ancestors. Now, you seek revenge?
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[Adamantoise]: Hmmm. As you wish. I'll call her for you.
*And then Adamantoise let out a mighty cry that sounded sort of like a wolf, or maybe a dying whale?*
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[Leviathan]: Can't you see I'm trying to enjoy myself? I have missed these seas. Your reason for disturbing me had best be good.
Leviathan is voiced by Claudia Black in English and Masako Ikeda in Japanese.
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[Leviathan]: Well now, what is this tiny creature?
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[Moogle]: And I'm here to help, kupo!
[Leviathan]: Tycoon and... Syldra, did you say? Ohhh! Astonishing. So their bloodlines survived! ...Hm? But hold. You say you seek vengeance upon me?
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[Leviathan]: Foolish girl. Am I to believe a whelp like you has any chance of defeating me? Not a chance. Not in a thousand years! Ha ha ha ha ha!
*And then Leviathan lunges at Faris, only to suddenly end up in the shadow realm*
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I believe Leviathan is the one being attacked here.
[Leviathan]: But how can... Ohhh! You two! How many long years have passed?
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[Leviathan]: Well, honestly, I'm not altogether certain myself.
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[Leviathan]: Once I left, any number of villains could have done them in. But that's no concern of mine.
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[Leviathan]: If their hatred for me has been festering all this time, then I cannot calm the waves by telling them it was all a big misunderstanding. As such, the wisest course of action is to accept their challenge. To... let them break themselves against me.
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[Leviathan]: Why would I let them win? I am not beholden to them. They chose this.
She's got a point, guys. Leviathan didn't come out here to start shit, that was all Faris.
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Faris is the one doing the fighting! You're taking the aggressor's side in this you idiots.
[Leviathan]: Well that... can be easily arranged!
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We're up against Leviathan now, and she's got a bit more fight in her than Odin does. Odin who, by the way, is -50 weaker to lightning than the giant water dragon that lives in water.
Leviathan's basic physical attacks will deal out about 900. If you have great water resistance then this is basically the only thing she can threaten you with. So if you've been training Mirages that specialize in water, this battle will be a pushover. That's because:
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Update 32 Highlights - Tidal Wave
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All of her other attacks are water based and also multi-target. This was a major problem for me as our current stacks don't hold up to water very well.
The battle is mostly the same as with Odin in that you just need to spam Thunder (or make use of Gravity). It can be the easiest of the four battles, but it could also be the most difficult. It all depends on your elemental defenses.
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*And Leviathan flops into the water unconvincingly*
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[Adamantoise]: Oh yes. Victory is yours.
[Moogle]: We did it, kupo!
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[Adamantoise]: Hm?
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[Adamantoise]: Tell me, why do you ask?
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[Adamantoise]: Ha ha ha! Don't be silly. She was, without a doubt, the worst of the Dyad's Servants. But no more. You have succeeded at avenging your kin.
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[Moogle]: Captain! We did it, kupo!
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"Ye made excellent bait!"
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How are you going to do that by the way? Is Syldra going to swim up the several kilometer high waterfall?
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[Adamantoise]: Ha ha ha ha!
Adamantoise and Leviathan are like an old married couple.
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Once again, we get the Pleiad Mirage without having to imprism it. We also get the memento.
As mentioned in the description, Leviathan is a long-running summon/boss of the FF series. It first showed up in FFII and has appeared in every main entry since (barring X). Sometimes Leviathan is a she (WoFF, XV) and sometimes a he (most other appearances). I'm not entirely sure what this scene is referencing though. Tycoon is Faris' father in FFV, but he's killed by Exdeath, not Leviathan (in the Earth Temple no less). As for Syldra, I can't recall if we ever find out what happens to the others like her, but they sure as hell weren't killed off by Bismarck, since Bismarck doesn't appear in FFV.
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Leviathan's signature attack is Tidal Wave (or Tsunami). Also as mentioned in the description, Leviathan has kind of been pushed to the side over the years due to Bahamut's popularity. It still frequently shows up, but Bahamut is usually the one that gets the big story scenes or fancy animations. XV flipped it around a bit and brought Leviathan back to have a prominent story role.
Before we go, when we beat one of the big four, we also get more Girl's Diary entries. I'm doing these fights in reverse order, so we picked up Entry 10 from Odin and 9 from Leviathan. In order to keep them in order, I'll show entries 7 and 8 now, then show 9 and 10 in the next update.
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Crappy parenting at work once more. The kids are told that mom's job is difficult, but nobody bothers to explain what is difficult about it. Lusse was the Queen that ruled over Nine Wood Hills (the original one, I mean. The one we saw in ruins), so the difficulty of her job was likely dealing with the bureaucracy of ruling over a country/city state (whatever the hell Nine Wood Hills was). Lann and Reynn just assumed that the reason her job was difficult was because of all the Mirages she had under her command, so in an effort to "help" their mom they started swiping Mirages from her control. Of course we know now that what they were actually doing was siphoning power away from her.
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Crappy parenting at work again. The kids started fucking around with a group of the most powerful Mirages in the world (Ramuh, Diablos, Leviathan, Shiva, Ramuh, Ifrit, and Bahamut). Instead of rightfully fearing/respecting the power these things possessed, they saw them as playmates that would obey their every command.
We'll hit up the final two members of the Pleiad in the next update, then we'll... wait, what's our goal after we gather the Pleiad?